Now. Since I'm still in her account, I think I shall stay for a little while and leave a trace for her readers. My next lesson begins in 15 minutes, so I'll just steal time to blog for while.The past week has been a bitch, I wonder myself how I had the energy to keep holding on, and still believe that things were going to be okay. However, life goes on, there isn' time to dwell on certain issues. Plus, with all the other problems I seem to be facing now, I don't wish to comprehend why unfortunate things keep happening. At times when the world just keeps crumbling down on top of me, I don't want to know the reasons why. I believe God put me through these obstacles to make me into a better person. Even though I don't know myself well enough to know how to handle such cases, I'll live by it, and let nature take its course. Maybe time will heal everything, maybe there wouldn't be a solution to solve it all. It may seem like I don't care about things going wrong, but the fact is, I'm as clueless as to what else I have to do, I'll just stay put and watch things happen, without having the power or knowledge to do the right thing. Sometimes, this silence is seen at a wrong point of view, and what's already bad gets worse, and I can't seem to entangle myself from such predicaments I'm facing. In the end, the fault points back to me, and because of keeping my mouth shut, not knowing what else to voice out, I tend to disappoint the wrong people. But it's okay. Time can change me, but I can't change time.Currently, I think I'm really grateful for the little things I've got in life now. It may not be much to others out there, but I seem contented with whatever I've got. With little things in life, you learn to appreciate it more. So I'll stand by with how life is, even though at times, it may seem really at its lowest and just when it couldn't suck more, it would.As for the love life, I'll always be in a stage where there isn't an absolute confirmed label to whatever situation I am in with him. We love one another, yes, but there isn't any official strings attached, that if other girls wants to get to know him, I am in no place to say anything. This is the one feeling I hate the most. You wanna say something, but you can't, because he doesn't already belong to you, therefore, he is free to mingle around with anyone he wants. Looking at it at a matured view, I began to apprehend the current situation. It hasn't been so long since we knew each other, I guess it's best if I know more about him rather than rush into things. Knowledge is a tricky thing. But the greatest thing about us is; there isn't much secrets between us. And I love the way he can tell me about the many girls he came across who wants his number or has their eyes on him, so openly. He isn't ashamed, he isn't afraid, and he doesn't really keep these things from me. There's honesty, and I guess, as the time passes by, I've grown to learn to trust him, more and more each day. Though at times when my handphone never beeps with his usual text messages, or receive his many surprise midnight phonecalls, I can't possibly be too dependent on him too much. It used to disappoint me so much, but I looked past those disappointments. He has got a life to live, and I can't possible have him 24/7 every day. I'll bet when my sisters read this, they'll be thinking "Woww, my sister has changed. She's getting matured. I'm so proud!" Ye la, Jannah. Macam faham. Hahaha.I think I don't wanna be too depressed or feel sorry for myself. Moving on. With all that had happened previously, it's best to learn from my mistakes and move forward. Just like the Robinsons (that cartoon movie), "Keep moving forward!" Hehe.Ok. Lesson's about to begin. Until the next time I'll drop by, see ya!Yours truly, Jann. :)Labels: HELLO I'M JANNAH.
