Now. Since I'm still in her account, I think I shall stay for a little while and leave a trace for her readers. My next lesson begins in 15 minutes, so I'll just steal time to blog for while.The past week has been a bitch, I wonder myself how I had the energy to keep holding on, and still believe that things were going to be okay. However, life goes on, there isn' time to dwell on certain issues. Plus, with all the other problems I seem to be facing now, I don't wish to comprehend why unfortunate things keep happening. At times when the world just keeps crumbling down on top of me, I don't want to know the reasons why. I believe God put me through these obstacles to make me into a better person. Even though I don't know myself well enough to know how to handle such cases, I'll live by it, and let nature take its course. Maybe time will heal everything, maybe there wouldn't be a solution to solve it all. It may seem like I don't care about things going wrong, but the fact is, I'm as clueless as to what else I have to do, I'll just stay put and watch things happen, without having the power or knowledge to do the right thing. Sometimes, this silence is seen at a wrong point of view, and what's already bad gets worse, and I can't seem to entangle myself from such predicaments I'm facing. In the end, the fault points back to me, and because of keeping my mouth shut, not knowing what else to voice out, I tend to disappoint the wrong people. But it's okay. Time can change me, but I can't change time.Currently, I think I'm really grateful for the little things I've got in life now. It may not be much to others out there, but I seem contented with whatever I've got. With little things in life, you learn to appreciate it more. So I'll stand by with how life is, even though at times, it may seem really at its lowest and just when it couldn't suck more, it would.As for the love life, I'll always be in a stage where there isn't an absolute confirmed label to whatever situation I am in with him. We love one another, yes, but there isn't any official strings attached, that if other girls wants to get to know him, I am in no place to say anything. This is the one feeling I hate the most. You wanna say something, but you can't, because he doesn't already belong to you, therefore, he is free to mingle around with anyone he wants. Looking at it at a matured view, I began to apprehend the current situation. It hasn't been so long since we knew each other, I guess it's best if I know more about him rather than rush into things. Knowledge is a tricky thing. But the greatest thing about us is; there isn't much secrets between us. And I love the way he can tell me about the many girls he came across who wants his number or has their eyes on him, so openly. He isn't ashamed, he isn't afraid, and he doesn't really keep these things from me. There's honesty, and I guess, as the time passes by, I've grown to learn to trust him, more and more each day. Though at times when my handphone never beeps with his usual text messages, or receive his many surprise midnight phonecalls, I can't possibly be too dependent on him too much. It used to disappoint me so much, but I looked past those disappointments. He has got a life to live, and I can't possible have him 24/7 every day. I'll bet when my sisters read this, they'll be thinking "Woww, my sister has changed. She's getting matured. I'm so proud!" Ye la, Jannah. Macam faham. Hahaha.I think I don't wanna be too depressed or feel sorry for myself. Moving on. With all that had happened previously, it's best to learn from my mistakes and move forward. Just like the Robinsons (that cartoon movie), "Keep moving forward!" Hehe.Ok. Lesson's about to begin. Until the next time I'll drop by, see ya!Yours truly, Jann. :)Labels: HELLO I'M JANNAH.
AS you can see, the birthday boy, is the one yg the most top pic. Yeah, that handsome boy right there! He's two years old. Uh-huh. Hmm.
Penat smlm lom abes, dah ader event lagi. HAHAHA. Hmm. Malas uhh nak update by words, just hope you people enjoy the pictures i'v put up for you. okay?? Let the pictures do the talking for me. Muahahaha. Tata. takecare readers!
It is difficult to say goodbye to someone or something you really love. It is a strain on the feelings and to those of us who feel and allow emotions to flow freely, there is a certain sad sweetness when we say goodbye. What is referred to here is when we say goodbye permanently, or semi-permanently; that is when we do not expect to see the person soon or perhaps ever again. When we grow to love someone, we form a wholeness with that person; when we say goodbye, that wholeness is broken& it is as if a part of us is wrenched away.
The hardest situation in which to say goodbye is when we are bidding farewell to a loved one who has gonefrom this world. I guess wakes &funeral rites were probably formulated so that we can make this goodbye emotionally tolerable. A great deal of holinessis thrown over the related rituals, which appear to be formulated in order to honour the departed one and to ensure his/her place in the next world. Let's put aside such beliefs, as for me, I see that the rituals were probably created so that we can console ourselves when we say goodbye. Don't you think so? The tide and sadness tears that we manage to hold back , usually burst out when the rituals are over & stark reality- that we will nvr see our beloved again- thrusts itself on us. Such goodbyes, are heart wrenching indeed. Saying goodbye to my beloved late grandmother which left this world for good on the 23rd March, was really tough one for me. Especially when I didn't get the chance to see her when she open her eyes the day before she left. I just couldn't believe that she's gone so soon. Now, I can still feel her presence. However, i just have to get the fact that she's no longer here. And what is left for us; the family members, is to pray for her well-being on the next world. Now, the only thing we get to keep is only the memories that she left behind, is just unforgettable to us. ):
well, moving on to the other 'goodbye'.....
Breaking up with someone who has been a beloved over a period of time is another sad goodbye. Some of us are 'old-fashioned' enough to put in our all into a relationship. It is really devastating when we realize that the other party to the relationship has been frivolous about it & has been restraining himself or herself. It is even more devastating when the relationship has been strong on both sides & when we have to break up because of circumstances; as in the case when one party leaves the country for good because his\her parents decide to send them over, often in such cases, i see posibility that the goodbye marks the end of a stage of a life & the beginning of another. Also, we may often see the person we saying goodbye to again. However the situation is not the same. For example, when a close friend or neighbour leaves for another neighbourhood , it is possible to continue seeing the neighbour, but it is the same thing? Can we still be as close as before? Can we still exchange food? Can we do almost everything that we used to do?Certainly not without special effort. The goodbye here is to a person as well as to a certain lovable situation.
It is true that gdbyes are just another way of saying "see you soon!' Naturally, I think in such cases gdbyesto fuss abt. But 'real' goodbyes are painful if not devastating. Yet, there is sweetness abt it all that we cannot explain. Right?
I've come to the end of my entry. So sorry for the wordy entry, But i hope all of u like what i've put up here. And this post is specially made for my late grandmother): Let's take some time off for now to reminisce the moments that we have spent with our loved ones that has left us.
LIKE FINALLY I'M BACK AFTER 2 FREAKING MONTHS! I'm so sorry for letting my dear lovable readers out there, to wait so long for my entry.
(: my apologies.
I'll be updating more
abt my freaking roller coaster life soon,
okay?
just wanna be brief here.
love you peeps!
muaackkks!