Firstly. i would like to apologise if my entry is too emo for today. For those who wish to read more till the end, you may do so. As for those who simply hate it, i would much appreciate if you'll just leave this page. Thankyou.

Well, 2007 is coming to an end in three days, and i just wish that all my problems and past could be left behind too. Ya, ya. I know, that everything is up to me to decide whether to think about it or not. Well, you ain't me to judge all that. It's been quite sometime since i have a talk to someone about my families and all. *sigh* Have any of you out there feel how is it like to be in an incomplete family? MAYBE some of you have been like me, unsure of what's bothering ourself.. right? and as for those who doesn't know how it feels like to be in this shitty situation, i suggest you just understand us bit by bit. We are not EMO. We are just feeling something is missing in our life, or maybe somethings aren't going the right way. Call us whatever you want, but i'm sure one fine day you'll understand how do we feel. Seriously, I'm not looking forward to 2008. Not even looking forward to my special day where i get a year older. Every year, is the same to me. Nothing special. And the nearer 2008 is, the more i feel so f**k up.Though i have Fahmi, my dearest friends, cousin(s) and all, i still do feel something is missing. People, i do appreciate all of you okay? Don't blame me. It's my natural feelings to feel this way.

I'm grateful with what i have. But.. but... *shout out loud* what the hell is wrong with me? Why do i always hope for something that is impossible to own? Why is it so hard for me to accept the fact that my life is written to be this way? Why? WHY isn't anyone feel guilty of what's happening around? WHY things seems to be easy on them? Isn't life miserable enough for me? Why more? Why doesn't he notice that i still need him after almost 8years apart? Why do i have to be like a beggar to beg for love and care? What wrong have i done? Why punish me this way? It's not only money that i want.... i want us.. the us that we use to be 8years ago.. why choose misery instead of happiness? why is it seems like i'm asking too much? I hate to be haunt by my own life. It's like i have to face the same thing again and again, every year. I can't run from it. It will forever stay this way. Just wondering why all this have to happen? Why do i have to witness every thing with my own very eyes? I'm tired to be this way. i just need someone, anyone who care to take all this off me? Someone willingly hear to what i have to say? And just understand that i've been longing to have a brother's love, father's love and everything. I know, maybe some of you out there, have more f**king moments in life. Well, everyone does, but not to those that are LUCKY still to have everyone they love with them.

Well, thanks again to those who willing to squint their eyes to read this stoopid 'emo' post. This is the only place i could just let out things. DO tag me aite. give me solutions, how do i make myself feel better? Till here then.